red rain

red :n.: a revolutionary activist.
warning, this will be fragmented, I am writing between customers…but then you all should be used to me being fragmented anyhow.
filthy commies. just a reminder, every definition I list on my site is an actual definition of the word, as provided by dictionary-dot-com.
anyhow, so, I woke up this morning groggy as a mofo from another one-am-number-crunching session. who’d have thought that spreadsheeting could be so fun? not me! though I’d never want to do it for a living. anyhow… in the shower I pondered some of the things that Travis was saying over skype last night. every where we look tools are springing up to get around advertising content, TiVo, streaming video online, podcasting, you name it. advertising gets in the way of the user experience. very few people -like- advertising, it is intrusive, annoying, and often obnoxious.
so, we have all these people getting around this big part of the economic backbone of our consumer society, the advertising industry because advertising is, frankly, outdated technology. they jump ship from media to media almost as fast as advertising can come in and exploit it. so, yeah, people are leaving Travis’ product and scooting over to ‘the other guys’. makes sense right? is the problem T’s product? now, the other guys product is basically the same, only difference is that it’s a lot less tied into advertising. give them a few months and the advertising industry will be on them like flies on shit. ads go where people go, and where ads go people flee.
so what is the solution to this?
advertising has to change. it needs to become user friendly rather than this agressive intrusive beast, especially when it is touching anything to do with the internet, where people can just jump ship to the next big thing in the blink of an eye. adding useless features to your product won’t save you if users are constantly suffering through pre-loading adverts and dancing logos everywhere.
my thought: build a small, non-animating logo space into the web product/service/whatever. just a small logo space for adverts in the bottom corner. yes, current advertising people will balk and say ‘hell no, that’s not enough impact’, but frankly, advertisers can be more than a little retarded about what people respond to. logo and hotlink it to your advertising website and people will click and go to it if they are interested. and you make it interesting by making the advertising fun. never understimate the power of a crappy flash game. coca cola have flash games all over, and people sit around playing them for a few minutes to half an hour all the while soaking up the coca cola logo and getting a craving for some cola. makes sense to me, people are participating in your advertising happily.
who knows though eh? the internet has really changed how people get, produce, and consume content. maybe the next wave in advertising is to let people make it themeselves. ( sorry all you designers out there, but customer created content is king, people who have ownership of what they’ve made or done become fanatical. even if it is ugly. ) that may be a neat thing to do… an advertising agency that doesn’t make ads, just makes tools and an environment for customers to make their own commercials and advertising… hmmm…

ewe shore are pretty

shore :n.: the land along the edge of an ocean, sea, lake, or river; a coast.
so, spinning down for the evening. all the tasks I wished to accomplish pretty much did not come to fruition. didn’t get illustrator installed, didn’t get to have the weekly business meeting, didn’t get any working on art work done, didn’t email mom about the condos none of us can afford.
all in all, it was a good art day. did some time in the old haunt, sindome which was a blast. only place in the world where you can make a homicidal psychopath weep with a few well placed words. gotta love when that happens.
went out and picked up some groceries.
cause yo his palms are sweaty, vomit on his shirt already, mom’s spaghetti…
listening to some eight mile soundtrack. it’s nice ‘pump me up and keep me motivated when I feel like tossing in the towel’ music. sad but true, one of my guilty pleasures are the lyrics and back beat that eminem lays down. that and b*witched. yes, I just linked the two, you know you love it.
talked to this condo fellow about stuff for mom. she’s got a nice idea, but now is not the time for that sort of planning, we are barely clawing our way to having our credit cards and credit limits paid off, we can’t worry about mortgages and down payments now… success is my only motherfucking option, failure’s not…
calgary flames won, ya.
someone propositioned me to do a project, you know who you are, email me all ready you crazy australien. curiosity bursting… snap back to reality, oh there goes gravity… I have all these postcards to send, and all these stamps to send em with… all… these… post… cards… he blows it’s all over… there is something I want to say, I know it, that’s why I’m typing here. don’t know what it is, so I’m rambling and maybe it will come out. not sure… yanno? dreams. goals. making it happen, tough to do. shit is all up in the air and we feel like we are juggling like mad to keep it all from falling down and making a mess. tossing everything up and spinning it around until we can find a way to lay all this shit down into a wall, a foundation to build a life on. you know?
like, money, up in the air, so is where we are living, how long we are living here, I’m trying to chase a dragon of a dream, as big and bad as anything laid down in the opium wars. yeah, I want. want it bad. bad as anything. can I do it? yeah. am I trying to jump into the deep end? damned right, head first with my eyes closed, and I really don’t know how deep this water is, may be pretty shallow, may be some jagged nasty shit there to take my skull out. dunno. but some other people seem ready and willing to jump with me. don’t know if that is good or bad or what. but yeah, you know, and there’s she, queen of my world, she’s got dreams and hopes and things she wants. my stuff in the air mixing with hers too, and what about her foundations? when do we lay some of that down? where’s the ring? where’s the ring? the ring is a minor thing, tick tock tick tock here it goes again, alarm in the morning, shower, retail life, home, eat some fritos, watch trash television, dream. research…. research… looking for a funder is coming down the pipe and we may have a line on someone, a couple lines, and that’s cool but there are a dozen road blocks and that funding comes with strings and anchors that tie me to a location that she may not want to be, or put us too long-distance to see…and it all just boils out of me while I do the dishes at eleven at night, frustrated as hell but not at the dishes or her but me, because god motherfucking damned it there are a lot of things flying in the air. deep breath, deep breath, sit on the shitter and read some pulp sci-fi and spin down the brain, quiet in here with the piss and shit and toilet-duck-blue water that still grows moss and mould. tick tock tick tock tick tock half an hour gone trying to spin my brain down, and another motherfuckin run with the big biz machine on the horizon and a pile of paperwork for something that makes my teeth on edge and makes me want to just say fuck it all to hell and just rip the motherfucking software off because going legit with it costs me time, patience, and money, and in ten minutes I can have a cracked copy on my hard drive running for nothing, but no, I send off the papers and toss another thing into the air, juggle motherfucker juggle, there ain’t no time to run, and yeah, some days you -do- want to call it quits but forget that, what would I do with my time? tick tock tick tock, it’s like a bomb, a big nasty terrorist style suicide bomb wrapped around my lower brain stem and waiting to blow, but no time for that, have to keep those things in the air. keep it in the air so we can set it down later. three years to thirty, and if I play the cards right, five years for my first million. two years later than I said I’d do it when I was fifteen… and I will make this motherfucking project work if I have to stand in the middle of hospital street and bend the god damned universe to my gods be damned will. tick tock tick tock tick tock.
and the cursor blinks in mockery.

theme song

theme :n.: an implicit or recurrent idea; a motif.
so, I’m just keeping up with the joneses. well, or at least my sister.
how does one pick a theme song? it is so… hard. do I go with Tarentino? do I go with Basie? do I go with Men Without Hats, because if I am dancing it may as well be the safety dance? do I go with neil diamond’s blue jeans? lazy towns’ ode to dental health? do I hate jimmy page enough to use mindless self indulgence as a theme song? I know I’m not a bird, I won’t fly away, and I’m not from st. louis, but maybe I am imogening it? am I coming across a wire or am I the god of hell fire? did I really forget about Dre?
well, since I’m rolling with the insomnia, lets go for some fat of the land. bring on the bass line and the wailing horns of jerico, bring on the hard razor back beat. bring the conga, bring the snare. it’s hunting music, and tonight I hunt solutions and sleep.
theme song tonight: climbatize
just count yourselves lucky that numa-numa didn’t win.

free song?

song :n.: a brief composition written or adapted for singing.
so, I have this free iTunes track that was given to me at this Apple Propaganda session ( see my post that changes everything ).
anyhow, I’ve got this bloody single free track and I can not figure out what to spend it on. like, honestly, I go back and forth constantly over what to get. the ideal song. the ultimate spending of my ninety-nine cents. I have been trying for ages…
but, here is the thing, if I was just BUYING the damned song, I wouldn’t even think. ninety-nine cents, big deal, clicky-click and I have it. but no, this is my FREE track. it has to be PERFECT.
so, song one I wished:
forever in blue jeans – neil diamond
not listed. crap.
song two I wished:
little green bag – reseviour dogs soundtrack
not listed. crap.
so, now I am still searching. do I go for the dave brubrek? do I go for the ludacris? I will let you all know when the search is done, until then, the pink card sits on my desk taunting me.


debunk :tr.v.: to expose or ridicule the falseness, sham, or exaggerated claims of: debunk a supposed miracle drug.
okay, so, I have this itch to figure out why gaming on the mac is so shite. so, we start with hardware. the debate goes that the gaming industry is wrapped around windows due to hardware. all the graphics cards are windows only, so all the games are windows only.
I am here to say otherwise.
before I go into this, let me just say that no I’m not doing benchmarking, no I’m not going to sit around and quibble the difference in performance one gets when using 400mhz RAM and 633mhz RAM, I’m not going to moan and quibble about bus speed and front side cache. I am going out and grabbing close approximations of machines at certain price points and hardware general abilities. my point isn’t to debate what machines are best at anything, but to say that giving hardware as a reason for a lack of games on the mac is bullshit.
let us start on the high end: for here I tried to spend as much money as any one hardware maker would let me without doing things like adding 16 gigs of ram or gold plating the computer.
Apple PowerMac G5 Quad Core 2.5ghz with the NVIDIA QUADRO FX 4500, 2 GB Ram, 500 GB Hard Drive, Keyboard, Mouse, and 3 Year Extended Warranty – $5,998.00 USD.
Alienware MJ-12 7550i – Intel Xeon 3.2ghz Dual Processor with the NVIDIA QUADRO FX 4500, 2 GB Ram, 500 GB Hard Drive, Keyboard, Mouse, and 3 Year Extended Warranty – $6,171.00 USD
Voodoo PC OMEN – AMD Athalon 64 FX-60 Dual Core 2.4ghz with the ATI Radeon X1900XTX 512 SS, 2 GB Ram, 500 GB Hard Drive, and 3 Year Extended Warranty – $6661.02 USD
Puget Custom Computers – AMD Athlon 64 FX60 Dual Core 2.6ghz with the Asus 7900 GTX 512MB, 2 GB Ram, 500 GB Hard Drive, and 3 Year Extended Warranty – $3582.48 USD
all right, now lets tackle the medium ‘consumer’ level machines:
Apple 20″ iMac Intel Core Duo 2.0ghz with the ATI Radeon X1600 256, 2 GB Ram, 250 GB Hard Drive, and 3 Year Extended Warranty – $2,243.00 USD
Alienware Area-51 7500 with Intel Pentium D Dual Core 2.8ghz with the NVIDIA GeForce 7900 GT 256, 2 GB Ram, 250 GB Hard Drive, and 3 Year Extended Warranty – $2,432.00 USD
Voodoo PC HEXX with Intel Pentium 4 HT 3.4ghz with the NVIDIA GeForce 7900 GT 256, 2 GB Ram, 250 GB Hard Drive, and 3 Year Extended Warranty – $2606.67 USD
Puget Custom Computers – AMD Athlon 64 X2 3800 Dual Core 2.0ghz with the EVGA GeForceFX 6800 256MB, 2 GB Ram, 250 GB Hard Drive, and 3 year Extended Warranty – $2,058.05 USD
and, finally, low end systems ( that really shouldn’t be considered as gaming machines anyhow ):
Apple Mac Mini Intel Core Duo 1.66ghz with Intel GMA950 graphics, 2 GB Ram, 120 GB Hard Drive, Keyboard and Mouse, and 3 Year Extended Warranty – $1,451.00 USD
VoodooPC IDOL with Intel Pentium M 740 1.7ghz with Integrated Graphics Video w/DVI, 1GB Ram, 120 GB Hard Drive, Keyboard and Mouse, and 3 Year Extended Warranty – $1,614.59 USD
Alienware Aurora 3500 with AMD Athlon 64 3000+ 1.8ghz with NVIDIA GeForce 6200TC 64/128, 1GB Ram, 160GB Hard Drive, Keyboard and Mouse, and 3 Year Extended Warranty – $1,360.00 USD
Puget Custom Computers – AMD Athlon 64 3200+ 2.0ghz with Asus GeForceFX 6200TC 128 (shared), 2GB Ram, 160 GB Hard Drive, Keyboard and Mouse, and 3 Year Extended Warranty – $1,277.29 USD
okay, so now that I’ve totally blown my plan to never use capital letters, lets take a look at the cost of the machines and the gaming power you get.
I’m not seeing this ‘huge hardware discrepancy’ that everyone talks about when saying Mac’s are poor for gaming. I’m seeing the big names in graphics cards there in the high and mid range. I will concede that the mac mini is a shitty gaming machine compared to the others, but not by a whole lot for that price point. I do imagine that one could strip out things like hard drives and what not and have a better graphics card on the ‘wintel’ side, but hey, this is a general comparison.
so, why is it that there are so few games for mac? hardware is virtually identical now. the only real difference is the software. so what does this mean to me? it means one thing only.
lazy. programmers.
the mac os is *nix based, and if one develops and outputs in universal binary the damned game will run with minimal code nudging. so why is it that development companies do not take the extra 5%-10% in development time to come out of the box mac ready?
I just don’t get it. someone give me an actual reason. please?

pink frosted hair

frosted :n.: a cold or icy manner.
she sat on the train, dressed in black poly slicker pants that were more zipper than fabric. her hair a halo of hard bleach blonde frosted with pink. every look she gave was hard and full of angst, and when I asked her about mary she just glared at me with these cold hard eyes.
I saw her the next day on the same train. and the next day. and the day after.
on the fifth day she came up to me before she got off and said she had seen her a few hours ago in a store at the mall. one of those art/poster stores that sell bad reproductions of jesus turning water into wine. when I got there mary was gone, and the store clerk would not answer my questions. as I left the mall I caught a glimps of a crow from the corner of my eye.
mary always did love the corvidae, she had named her twin daughters raven and rook. I watched as the crow flew out of view, banking around to the far side of the mall.